The Enemy Within

From The Editor

Welcome to the June edition of “Fearlessly Authentic”. Hope you enjoyed the last edition that spoke to us taking some action during the pandemic. After REST then ACTION, however what if you are paralysed by fear or you have become your own worst enemy; what then?? This month, Ruby Igwe, our guest writer continues her journey through this pandemic musing on why the “Call to Arms” may have proven challenging to get on the road. Enjoy the read and do send in your comments. If you would love to contribute an article on how you have lived through these times please do send an email to me. Stay alive, Stay hopeful. MOVE FORWARD!

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The Enemy Within

Hello! I hope you have spent the past month calling yourself to arms, because I definitely have! I don’t know why, but this crisis and the turmoil around the world has me thinking in some very military terms. We have rested. We have said, okay, let’s get back in there, let’s get this show on the road, let’s get moving!

I was thinking as I said very militarily, and I gathered my thoughts and my mind and my body and decided on how to move forward in spite of our current context. “Battle stations!” I said to myself, ready to resume and continue to show my fearlessly authentic self to the world. Then I found myself slacking. Like, big time. And I realized I was in my own way.

There is an African proverb that says that “if there is no enemy within, the enemy outside can do us no harm.” A part of me was terrified at the prospect of even venturing out from the Covid-19 cocoon I’d been in for the past few months. I was scared of trying and scared of failing. I felt lazy. Getting in the game and working out and being intentional just seemed so daunting.

Ladies let’s focus this month on the enemy within. The part of you that if you’re not careful can undermine your authenticity. In psychology it is called the shadow self, your not so desirable traits. Maybe enemy is a strong word but if you think about it, you can literally obstruct yourself from achieving your set goals. So no to the enemy within.

I for one had to embrace my full self and come to terms with my fear, self-criticism, laziness, procrastination, indiscipline and couch potato-ness, if there is such a word. I rationed my TV-time. Began to affirm. Reiterated my goals to myself. Worked through the steps to those goals and took them in manageable chunks day by day. And I’m still pushing. If I can, you can!


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